My Diabetes Information Blogs
Are You Going to Eat That? Ironic Diet Choices
01/29/08
General
By Eric Devine
When I was 12 years old I was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes. A week after my diagnosis I went to a middle school dance. There was a limbo contest, and either out of sympathy for me, or by virtue of my dexterous skills, I won a giant bag of Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups.
This was my first of what has now become an almost two-decade-long series of awkward encounters with food. There I stood, arm outstretched for my prize, only to let it drop to my side. My teacher saw my action, and in a painfully slow moment of recognition, went wide-eyed and said, “Oh, that’s right, you can’t have these.”
I wish I had a new islet cell for every time I heard this or some variation on it. It’s terribly unfair. Food has such deep social and psychological connotations, that to refuse eating, for whatever reason, has far-reaching implications. For the 12-year-old, it’s a terrible social mark of outcast. For adults, it’s not so different.
Yet, as adults we entertain this rightful indignation of being able to choose for ourselves, despite good intentions or common sense. No one’s going to tell me what I cannot eat! Which really means: No one is going to tell me who I am! I think of it as the classic angel and devil on our shoulders, the push and pull of our conscience. The choice is not merely resting on the food item considered. The struggle is born out of a desire to exert power over our own lives.
So much of our independence has been stripped away, but we still have the power to decide what goes into our mouths. Sadly, this decision-making process is often colluded with irony, filled with poor decisions that harm our bodies and only render us weaker for the action. The exertion of willpower is the greatest virtue to harness in this battle, however much we want to give in to temptation, either as a refuge or as a self-defining act.
The choice is always ours. That element will never change. It’s how we reason with the challenge that defines us. Like I said to my teacher, “No, I can’t. What else have you got?”
Eric Devine lives in upstate New York where he teaches English. His insights have been published in Diabetes Forecast. He currently works with a local organization, The Sugar Free Gang, to help people with diabetes address their health and social needs.